I just have to share with you a recent letter I received from a friend. She and I used to share in some things in life together, and we have somehow lost touch with each other over the years. Our kids are friends and we do see each other, but only occasionally. I had posted on my blog and shared the post on facebook. I was overwhelmed with gratitude when I read her words, so honest and heartfelt.....
Randy,
This is going to seem really strange to you to hear from me, but artists are people who "feel"in order to create and I want to share my feelings with you.
I was on Facebook, I saw your beautiful painting, and I wanted to look at it more, so I clicked on your blog. Suddenly, I was in another world. I started clicking the older posts link so I could read more about Paris and Provence. I found myself getting very emotional, and suddenly I started to cry. I didn't know why, but I imagine it has to do with several things. One, the beauty of the country held me. Then, reading about the joy that you were feeling while you were there moved me greatly. When I read about the man at the station trying to help you, I imagined you all alone, a bit fearful, and how brave you were to try to maneuver through this unfamiliar territory. I began to think of all the times that I have been in that position and thinking to myself "What's the worst thing that could happen? I could die, surely, but other than that, I'm ok." Unfortunately, it was never about a wonderful journey like yours, but nonetheless, it was the same feeling, I should think. I began to think about how I have always wanted to paint. I am a very good sketch artist, but painting has always intrigued me. I then began to think about my life and how it is solely made up of working and raising kids. I will never have an opportunity to go to France and study art. I will never be able to even stay anywhere in a first class hotel in America! I'm 57 years old, I have done most everything I ever wanted to do in my life, except have money enough to relax and enjoy it. Your blog touched me beyond words. In a way, I am sad for what I miss out on, but mostly, I am moved by the beauty of this world. Should I make a bucket list, or should I be content that God has given me a home and healthy children? Do I leave care to the wind and charge up a trip to a place that pulls at my heart, or spend all my money on this house and the repairs? In a few years, both my kids will be grown and I will be nearing retirement age. Will I have enough to survive, let alone enough to enjoy what remains of my life?
I am not asking for pity, at all. I am not even sure why I am telling you this, except the painting of a well dressed homeless French man brings me to tears and a picture of beautiful gardens where a famous artist once painted does the same. Is this the power of art? Does it move you so much that you begin exploring within yourself and go to places where you don't want to? I am not going to paint, as I imagine you will invite me, because I simply don't have any energy left. But, I thought to myself, "I wonder if Randy thinks about what people are feeling when they read her posts? Does she think that only artists and students of art are reading it? Does she think that her friends are reading it because they love her and want to see what she is up to? Or does some old friend from the past curiously explore her world and find emotions that haven't dredged up in a very long time?"
I think I should thank you, for the emotion that has come over me. I am not jealous, because I learned a long time ago that what I have is what God wants me to have. I just want you to have this gift, this knowledge that a simple post on Facebook has changed me today. Maybe just for today, I don't know. Or maybe it is the beginning of something that needs to stir inside of me.
I asked her if I could post her letter. She said I could, maybe an excerpt. But I had a hard time leaving anything out. Yes, she is an artist. But until I read this I thought she was an actress and I didn't know she was interested in painting. So, maybe some day she will decide to give it a go. I hope so. What I love most about being a teacher is seeing how much painting can bring joy, just pure joy, into one's life!
Why do I get to live my dream and not her? I think we shall find a way my friend. Blessings to you......
3 comments:
Teresa Harbert commented on your post. Teresa wrote:"Oh my goodness, what an elegant letter expressing a depth of emotion that most never reach. Thanks for sharing this, Randy, and I send thanks to your friend for opening the door of her heart. It is never too late to stretch for a dream, even if it's just a tiny step in that direction. God gives us those yearnings and we all need to learn to listen and take action. Getting "there" is not the goal, moving toward "there" is where the life change happens. So I say, unleash that artist buried inside and see what happens."
What a beautiful testament! WOW!! Thanks so much for sharing. There is alot of wisdom in that letter, too, about blooming where we are planted and feeling gratitude for where we are today.
Wonderful!
Susan
Manuel wrote:
"For most artists, we never know who we touch (or maybe more precisely, who God touches through our art). You have been given a tremendous blessing in being able to see deeply into the heart of one for whom your art has made an impact. I am happy for you, and for your friend."
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